Chapter 354) Saved By The Blaine

“We cannot shape the world according to the delights society decrees appropriate for us; we must be unconventional in our joys and find them wherever we can.”

― Rose Tremain
The Elysium 
Home to Chase & Hailey Cameron and their son Connor (9) and Colton & Maddie Vatore and their daughter Keira (9)

Laughing, Blaine looked up from the conversation he was in with the group he was standing with, his eyes narrowed as his laughter slowed down, distracted by something he had spotted.

“I’ll be right back.” he said into the round at nobody in specific.

Dodging several other party guests on his way towards the corner near the dining table where several people were engaged in what could be carefully described as a heated discussion, their emotions only curbed by the attempt of not causing a scene at someone else’s home, Blaine caught parts of their conversation.

“Pappa, really, not AGAIN, not here and not now!” pleaded Adrianna.

“Do not interrupt me when I am talking! Do you think the rules change only because you changed your last name, young lady?”

“Don’t belittle my wife!” Nick aggressively snarled, which caused Auditore senior to puff up, but all got distracted when Blaine suddenly put his arm on his shoulders.

“Hey crew! What’s going on here? Looked like a whole lotta action from over yonder, so I came to join the fun.” Blaine said, Ezio shook Blaine’s arm off, glaring at him, while stepping into a safe distance.

‘This doesn’t concern you. It’s a family issue.”

“Aww, aren’t you just adorable as you tell me that while hovering your ass on those thick Italian potato stompers in my son’s home, while talking to my family. Yeah, that’s right, you are just a big fucking ball of luck then, cos guess what I am?! Hint: opposite of stranger and rhymes with ‘damn-ily’. So, what’s the topic that has all the pulses going off like nitroglycerin on a rocky road? Cos, spoiler alert, I don’t really ever do this staying out of shit thing if it looks like someone’s agitating people I care about.” Blaine asked undeterred, it was Adrianna who answered.

“Oh Blaine, Pappa just won’t stop pestering us to have a baby, even though we explained to him a million times now that we are not ready for a child yet, and why we aren’t.” she told him, unusually upset for her normally very composed demeanor.

“Ah, I see. You hear this Meat-A-Ball? Hearing gone bad from your advanced age or no comprendo? Or you still in the market of sucking the fun out of everything for everyone, huh, even here at my son’s home, which in my book is a big fat NONO?! I’ll translate my grandson and granddaughter-in-law’s stance on the baby subject into Mafioso for ya then: They no wanna baby, capisce? They are happy as they are and wanna mattress mambo just for fun, ya know, fun-fuckin’, maybe you should try it sometime, so you’re not constantly wound so tight. And you know what else Addy and Nick want? If your guess was ‘her daddy to keep his big Italian nose the fuck out of their business’, you just won yourself as many refrigerators as you can catch. Got it? Yeah? Good. If not, I am always happy to help ya out again. And believe you me, if I hear you continue this shit with them after we had this lovely girl talk, I WILL come find you and tell you again.” Blaine spoke exaggeratedly loudly, while trying to pull Ezio in again, by putting his arm back on his shoulder, which Ezio immediately shook off this time.

“What the hell is wrong with you?! How dare you?! Get your hands off me, you unpolished buffoon! Crude! Never heard of respecting someone’s personal bubble?” he roared.

“But I wanna pop that bubble, cos you geriatric hunk, I wanna touch you all over and over again because I like fondling you JUUUST as much as you like agitating my grandson and his lovely wife over there. Now give grampa a big wet kiss! MUAH MUAH MUAH!” Blaine made kissing noises, while puckering his lips.

“Imbecile! Rude, crude and simply awful is what you are! You should be ashamed of yourself! Isn’t that boy too old to kiss his grandfather? He’s a married man now!” Ezio grumbled, while straightening out his suit jacket.

“I wasn’t talking to Nick. Pucker up, Mafioso and gimme some luvings!”

Blaine pretended trying to kiss Ezio, while he was pushing Blaine away from himself repeatedly, grimacing, complaining.

“That is outrageous! Get away from me. Will you desist!? Mio dio!!” Ezio exclaimed, then turned to walk away, but Blaine was relentless, which started a walked chase, with Ezio continuously swatting at and shoving Blaine from himself.

Adrianna and Nick were laughing hard watching on.

“All that needs is the Benny Hill theme song. I wish we could have your grandpa move in as a daddy deterrent when he gets antsy about kids again. I love my Pappa, I do, but sometimes …. oof!”

“I just want to reroute the phone calls we get from him to grampa Blaine, but somehow listen in. Anyway, I have a feeling grandpa might have gotten through to him now. I mean, you really think your dad wants to risk Blaine going off on him like this again?” laughed Nick.

Chase joined them now, right as Blaine and Ezio headed towards the stairs, still chasing.

“Should I be worried about my father trying to what looks almost like sexually harass yours, Addy?” he asked, bemused.

She was still laughing hard, while shaking her head, Nick answered in her stead.

“Nah, just some lopsided bromance/frenemy thing I think, although, with Blaine, you never know. Your dad actually rescued us from having to explain for the umpteenth time why we dare to have been married for a whopping 6 months without having produced an heir. I mean, seriously, right?” Nick laughed harder.

Chase joined into the laughter, then shook his head.

“How many heirs does that man want? Most of his older kids have 2 or 3 kids already. Even Grady and Giulia complain to us about him breathing down their neck about ‘one more’ and they have three already, the oldest being a teen now. He once made the mistake of trying that shit with my Patches, but I tell ya what, she set his ass straight – like THAT. He never asked any of us again. Plus, he has a young son himself by his young wife. If he wants more kids so badly, why doesn’t he make his own batches with Meaghan?” Chase chuckled.

“Oh, don’t you even go there Chase Cameron! It’s bad enough to have siblings with kids OLDER than your youngest brother! No more of that. The one young sibling we have is one too many already!” Adrianna wagged her finger at him, which Nick caught, kissed the tip off, before wrapping his arm around her shoulders, while telling her.

“Addy … you do realize that Chase is my uncle, right? There are only a few years between us, meaning he and his siblings have that age gap thing going on too, right? I am one of those examples, child of the oldest sibling, and I am older than his youngest sisters and brother, my aunts and uncle. Yeah. Even AG is older than our Uncle Gavin. Sooo … the thing you hate about your family is probably part of the Cameron family motto – or it should be. That and something about coffee, humor and music.” chuckled Nick, making Chase grin wider.

“Oh, sorry Chase, I didn’t think about that …” Adrianna blushed slightly, but Chase interrupted her.

“Don’t worry about that Addy, I don’t care. If you are born a Vamp like I was, you learn early on that you can kiss ‘normal’ goodbye. It’s fine, I don’t mind it anymore and none of my siblings are 100% convinced that there won’t be any more siblings in future. I mean, eternity is a long time. My son’s 9 now, hard to believe, so if that happens, he’d be at least a decade older than his aunt/uncle. Yeah, normal is not an option for my kind. Our mostly youthful appearance is also misleading, while we do age some, it can take hundreds of years. I am not a few years older than you, Nick, I would be 37 now, heading towards middle age, and you just turned 25, right? Little over a decade between us, but who’s counting, right? And also, someone clearly has not been reading the signs at the Cameron Mansion or the Cameron Estate. Both list at least two out of what you said, Music and Laughter. Third one is Love, probably cos something about Coffee would have looked desperate, and nobody could fit anything about weird family relationships on that or the sign would have been a wall spanning a whole block.” Chase smiled, then winked at Addy, who giggled.

Colton now appeared, patting Chase’s back briefly and roughly.

“Hey Gump, you old sock, wanna entertain the crowd by debuting our latest tune? Special treat, it’s not been released anywhere yet, but it’s a great tune with crazy beats and one of the best guitar riffs known to mankind by yours truly. It’s called “The Only Constant”.”

“First, you failed attempt at a human being, only Patches gets to call me Gump, and secondly, why are you hunkering down here then? Get to the studio and start dragging our shit out to get set up, you’re not getting paid the big bucks to weigh down the flooring.”

“I don’t get paid the big bucks; I EARN them. And why don’t you just pull the bottom lip over your head and swallow, Cameron?!” Colton shot back and for anyone who didn’t know them, this would have probably seemed serious now, but those who knew them were well aware that this was just best friends being boys.

“Because I am the lead singer of the band that pays the bills and without me, your ass would be homeless and probably soon after wifeless and daughterless, too.”

“Wow, delusions of grandeur, check! You, without me, would be just another pretty boy howling into a microphone for pennies, after your wife and son left you for a real man. And this house is OUR house, not yours, you wet noodle. But sure, I get our stuff and get it set up, cos if I let you do it, this party would last a week, since you get crap done slower than a slug who overdosed on sleeping pills!”

“I better go with or you Neanderthal will break everything, as technically inept you are, brawns for brain!”

Laughing, Chase followed his best friend and they continued bickering on their way to the studio.

At the same time Nick nudged Adrianna, pointing at two men sharing drinks and talking enthusiastically near the bar cart in the living room. Friendly, not fighting.

“Are you kidding me right now?” Addy burst out.

“Oh good, so you do see it too. I wasn’t sure if I am delusional. That’s my grandpa for ya. He gets shit done, somehow.”

“You think he hypnotized my dad or something?” Adrianna wondered.

“I think it’s called ‘compelling’ if done by Vampires, I am not sure grandpa would do that to anyone, but if he did, I sure hope it lasts forever and I hope he also compelled that baby fever out of his brain while he was at it!”

“I’ll drink to that.” Adrianna agreed.

“I’ll get a bottle!”

Categories Cameron LineageTags ,

3 thoughts on “Chapter 354) Saved By The Blaine

  1. 😂 Blaine – what will we do without his -isms! LOL
    Ezio has more than met his match here! I agree with the kids, get off that bus, Dude.


  2. Oh my goodness! That was worth a chapter just to hear Blaine go off. I do wonder if he used compulsion on Ezio to get him to calm down. And the banter between Chase and Colton was cracking me up too.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I was literally laughing out loud during Blaine’s antics. Also, the weird generational gaps reminded me of my own family – my grandfather had my father at 16, then remarried much later and had 2 more children. So my uncle and one of my aunts are 1 and 5 years younger than me 😂

    Liked by 1 person

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