Chapter 501) Redamancy & The Messes We Made

“Hope is the thing with feathers
That perches in the soul
And sings the tune without the words
And never stops at all.”

― Emily Dickinson

Redamancy -NOUN- (Latin)
(rare) The act of loving in return, fully and wholly.

Forgotten Hollow
Castello Vatore

Even dressed in his thick and warm winter clothing it was hard to miss the athleticism of the tall, blonde, handsome young man now vicariously shaking his head.

“Great-grandpa, you have to fix this. HAVE TO. It’s not a request, but a demand. I know my body, I can feel there is something going on and I know it’s not normal or good. I KNOW what is going to happen to me before long, I am not an idiot! If you can’t prevent this from happening to me, then you need to either unturn me as soon as it happened or turn Keira again too! I insist!”

“Turn ban in effect, you fool! You can insist in one hand and piss in the other, see which fills up first, you snotnose! Mind your tone when speaking to our Grand Elder!” Caelan growled. Unusual for him, normally he kept quiet unless directly addressed, usually by his father Caleb.

“Screw you, Caelan! Nobody asked for brawns, I am talking about brains, which you know NOTHING about!” Connor barked back at the frightening vampire executioner, known for his ruthlessness and short fuse.

Caelan instantly became furious, taking two steps toward his great-nephew when his older sister Scarlett stepped in his way, her expression matching his.

Their eyes locked for a second, before Caelan stepped backwards with a dismissive grunt, Scarlett relaxed, while Blaine grinned, receiving a slap from Caelan on his way back to his original spot.

“Ouw! Letty! Did you see that? You gonna do something?” Blaine whined.

“I don’t have to, Caelan did it for me. Behave, Blaine, please. No jokes, baby, not now. I usually let you run with it, but not tonight. This is really neither the time nor the place.” she told him.

Before Blaine could respond, Caleb demonstratively cleared his throat and took the floor again.

“Well, thank you, if I then may speak, considering I am your leader as my son so kindly pointed out. Connor, I understand your frustration noticing what may or may not be first signs of a re-turn, as it may be inconvenient, maybe even startling, but alas, there is no fix for this, no magic wands or special potions. We’re not witchfolk, we’re vampires and this is what it is, the dark spark reclaiming its spot. All any of us can do is let nature take its course. Everyone this happened to, is happening to or will happen to was naturally born as a vampire, so clearly, nature insists you all should be vampires, not mortals. I am sorry. Truly.” Caleb stated plainly and calmly.

“He’s truly sorry, ha, what the actual fuck?! SORRY?! That’s all you got? Sorry??? You’re kidding. What have you been doing all this time? It’s been months since the first former vampires turned back, I’d know, because one of them is my own father! Yet, you are still no further than you were then, so what HAVE you been doing since? Counting and recounting every single re-turn on some wooden abacus switching hands between scratching your head and your balls or what? Where is the solution, oh mighty leader!? If I am turning back into the one thing I least want to be, you had better come up with a fix – FAST!” Connor ranted.

“Connor, mind your manners and show me some due respect or I will have you tossed into holding until you remember whom you are speaking to!” Caleb threatened, becoming agitated himself, but nothing like the level Connor was already at, which became clearer when he spoke again.

“Sure why not? Lock me away. If I am really gonna turn, I will be useless for a week or two while laying around your basement anyway, time during which I can’t take care of my pregnant wife, who really needs me right now. Inconvenient, as you called it. Not to mention that if I am really turning again, I will involuntarily be rubbing Keira’s nose into an old detriment of hers, namely that she always felt she should have been born a vamp, seeing how she is blood of your blood, a Vatore by birth, from the oldest vampire line still in existence today, yet she has always been the mortal while I was cursed with that goddamn vampire spark that I never wanted, a life I always hated and which has caused me nothing but trouble! It will be a slap in the face for both of us and I can’t do anything to stop it! Nature my ass! I am a scientist and let me tell you there is NOTHING natural about what we are. All vampires are unnatural mutations of nature! Freaks! That’s what! And I do not want to be a freak again!” Connor ranted.

“CONNOR, ENOUGH!” Riordan, Caleb’s right hand, the thinker, the quiet balance of the vampire leadership rarely ever lost his cool, but he did now. Scarlett stepped up.

“I agree. Connor, please stop. You heard my father, there is no solution, no fix, no magic button and we always knew vampirism is a strong power, which is why un-turning was so incredibly hard to achieve in the first place, there were no long-term studies as you may know from your medical background, but it would be a mistake trying to liken vampires to mortals. As similar as we are in some aspects, we are not the same. And you know that. You should take some pride in it, not try to fight a battle you cannot win.” she told him as calmly but firmly as she could.

“Ah yeah? Then why are my sisters not turning back? They were born as vampires, yet, still show no signs of re-turning. Why? Or better: why ME?”

“The fact that you are the genius in this room, yet unable to see the obvious tells me that you are not thinking clearly. Connor, you need to calm down, your anger is hindering you. The reason your sisters remain mortal while you might be re-turning is simply because the spark is not activated until puberty. You know that. I know that. They were young enough when they were un-turned, so it hadn’t manifested yet. You were already a young adult when you were un-turned. It’s that simple. And obvious.” Scarlett told him, when Noah piped up.

“Sorry, but I am with Connor. Nolan and I both are planning to get married soon. I can’t drop during the ceremony and start changing and be carted off to the castle for a few weeks to come back with fangs and a thirst for blood. Holly and I have a date set already and deposits down. Non-refundable. We’re all trying to build our lives here.” Noah argued.

“Yeah, like my brother said, we can’t be vampires again! Alessa wants to marry a man, not a caricature, playing some ‘vamp-mortal-vamp-peekaboo’ with her. I don’t know how this unturning BS works, but Imma gonna lose my shit for realz if we all have to start learning how to be vampires from scratch and have no sun immunity. Our wedding will be in Tartosa, my future wife’s place of birth, I can’t stand there at the altar with 50 layers of sunscreen holding an umbrella like a total dork or some bullshit like that. And Alessa wants to start a family with me within the next 5 years or so. She wants happy, healthy rugrats, not be manufacturing Fangs with me so the government can get their panties in a bunch over the vampire headcount again! What the actual eff! This wasn’t the deal!” Nolan added.

“Well, gentlemen, I am deeply sorry to hear how becoming what you were always meant to be, a life you were born into, now so deeply inconveniences your family planning, but to me, that is barely the tip of the iceberg of backlash I have to face because of all this. Let me calm your worries first, Nolan, the unturning didn’t reset anything, if and when you become vampires again you will be exactly where you were before as far as skills go. To address Connor’s concern about what I have been doing, I have been working on a solution feverishly, but what you gentlemen are overlooking is that I am the one having to face trying to make all that palatable for the other occults and the mortal government while preserving the peace with all of them as they get – to use Nolan’s befitting description – their panties in a bunch over our headcount so rapidly increasing back to basically where we started at, and that isn’t even taking into account the babies being born with the spark. None of the other leaders likes this phenomenon any better than you gentlemen do, just obviously for different reasons. The cured wolves stayed cured. Descended witchfolk are just regular humans without skills still. And here we are, back to where we were, which understandably has to feel like a bad April Fool’s joke to them all. I can only tell you what I will tell them: we are what we are, we tried to change that for some of us, only to find it’s impossible for everyone born like this over a certain age. Vampirism, the spark some of us were born with is hardwired into our being and is simply too powerful to tame, let alone kill off. There is no real cure. No point placing undue blame on me, I always said un-turning a vampire is unnatural and should never be done, but you all kept begging and demanding, then the mortal government put a proverbial gun to my head, and I felt that preserving the fickle peace between the species was worth attempting it. We even found a solution, which works on the youngest and on those who once were mortal, but it just does not work permanently on natural born vamps. It is like trying to change the entire genetic setup of a grown human being. It’s impossible and doesn’t make sense. Either way, I maintain what I have been telling you and everyone: it cannot be fixed. If you turn back, it’s fate and you will have to find ways to make peace with it and deal with it.” Caleb’s tone was firm.

Connor shot fiery glares at his great-grandfather.

“Fine. I’ll go home and deal with this shit then. Remember to deal when after the birth of our son, Keira is going to be turned. By me. And I am not even gonna try to ask you, we’ve been at that very impasse before and you didn’t hear me then either, instead you had your brawn over there rough me up. So, I am just gonna go for it this time. Cos, ya know, you’re just gonna have to deal. Until then, FUCK THIS SHIT! Pointless coming here. Don’t know why I even tried. Again!” Connor snarled, then turned and walked off.

“I didn’t rough you up, you brat! Father asked you to leave, and when you wouldn’t, he asked me to see you out, but you started throwing punches at ME. THAT was when I roughed you up a little! Get the story right, you little weasel!” Caelan rambled on, while Connor didn’t even look back.

“Connor! Return at once! You have not been dismissed and I am not finished with you yet!” Caleb ordered, in vain as the loud slamming of the door confirmed, echoing eerily in the current silence.

“I’ll get that rude little sucker back. He’s got that attitude problem from that one over there.” Caelan grumbled, pointing at Blaine, but Scarlett touched his arm, shaking her head.

“No, Cae you will not. I will speak to my grandson myself, later. Alone. Once he had time to simmer down, as clearly right now he is not able to think straight. And you all will give him time or you will learn that Connor and Blaine are not the only ones here present with severe attitude problems. I agree, Connor is out of line, and I will remind him to show respect where it is due, but I am not pleased with you blowing him off as you have, father. Can you not see how detrimental it is to him? Connor is hurting right now. He is worried and afraid. And what about Noah and Nolan? Don’t blow off their concerns. I understand your point, it appears that the cure only works on some, not all. That’s not an easy pill to swallow. Some vampires deal well, like he has …” Scarlett pointed at Caelan’s son Connell, who had been quietly standing by.

He also involuntarily re-turned into being a vampire some weeks ago, but just accepted what could not be changed, shrugged it off, kissed his mortal wife Emmy, then already reported back to work with his father Caelan to hunt rebellious and law-breaking vampires to bring them to justice by vampire laws. Unfazed by unchangeable facts.

“Gavin has turned back, Blythe and Fallon have, Chase and Colton have. They are all dealing well with it, maybe even prefer it, especially Fallon. I am a vampire into the deepest corners of my heart and soul, my entire being, I would never wish for a different life, I know Caelan and Blaine would agree, but some do not want this life back, and they never will enjoy it as much as we do. Like Connor. And Noah, and Nolan.” Scarlett now said.

“Well, Scarlett, my petal, I understand all that, but it doesn’t change the facts. Fact is, I cannot and moreover I will not attempt to unturn again. Not anyone, not for any reason. It doesn’t work on the natural born ones, and if I only do it to some, everyone will be on the ramparts screaming about injustice and they all want the same piece of the same cake, whether it makes sense for them or not. There was a time we were bound to the darkness, I found a way for all of us to walk in the daylight. It didn’t take long for them to demand the next thing, and the next. They wanted this and that and the other, then to be able to eat like mortals, which is rubbish if you ask me. I give them that and then they wanted to be mortal altogether. It never ends, and the unturning of born vamps is nonsense, only causes even more discord. Clearly, it is proven pointless. So, my beautiful daughter, what is your solution, since you are so outspoken about mine being insufficient. Tell me the way and I shall listen.”

“Smart man! I took a couple detours to get to that revelation but now I know, always listen to Scarlett, she knows shit about shit.” Blaine injected.

“Is that so, Blaine? The wonders never seize indeed.” Caleb’s tone was oozing sarcasm, so Scarlett spoke up again.

“The solution is right in front of you, father. I understand, unturning again is not feasible. I understand why it seems to work on children before they reach puberty, as they are practically identical to mortals until puberty activates the hormones and with them the vampiric spark they were born with, which until then lay dormant within them. Once vampirism manifested in a person, it may just be too strong to every fully subdue. I also understand that turning and unturning a person repeatedly could be damaging, we don’t know much about the actual process, but we do know it involves rebuilding and breaking down organs and bodily functions, doing that over and over cannot be good, so I agree it’s not worth the risk and therefore out of the question for re-turned vampires. I understand that, so all the other vampires will too if it is properly explained to them. But we have to give everyone affected by this more than just pitiful glances and a shrug of our shoulders. So here is my proposal. Unturning naturally born vampires past puberty is completely out of the question. That is the firm rule. But there needs to be leeway in some other direction. I understand why you have a strict turn ban in effect, and fully support that. We don’t need armies of vampires, until we run out of ways to feed them all. There need to be limits. But there’s no rule without an exception. So, let your solution be hope and logic. Make it conditional, that way nobody can argue with the qualifications. Offer to those directly affected by this returning of formerly unturned vamps a chance to petition for a review, their mortal partners, children, etc. Look at each case on a one-by-one basis and decide to either turn the mortal partner or to turn or unturn their child if they are young enough – or deny their wish if you find it unreasonable. Even if you deny, you at least showed them you care and heard them. Give them a choice, hope, something other than just burying them beneath laws and rules, show them you heard them and care about their worries and concerns, and the masses will calm down and continue to follow you as the kind and righteous leader we know you as. Would such a solution be acceptable to you, Noah and Nolan, seeing how you will probably face the same fate that is looming over Connor’s head?”

“Yeah, I guess. It’s not ideal, but better than doing nothing at all. If I can’t be mortal, at least this would give my future wife a choice to either join me or if she doesn’t want that we at least can make that decision for any future kids we may or may not have. I think it’s good. Next best thing to us having a real choice in what we want to be.” Noah nodded.

He looked at his twin brother, who nodded as well before he spoke.

“Yeah, what Noah said, even though I can already tell you, Alessa would never want this life. She is NEVER gonna want to be turned and she definitely doesn’t want to raise fanged kids, so at least the unturn option for kids from mixed marriages would be helpful to us down the road. So yeah, this isn’t the best thing since sliced bread, but at least a way out of disaster and like grandma said, at least we’re not just blown off and told to get back in line. I think it holds. I could live with it.”

Caleb looked around the room, Riordan, Caelan and Connell nodding approvingly, Blaine smiling and shrugging in a ‘told-ya-she’s-good’ manner.

Caleb nodded too, looking at his daughter appreciatively.

“Scarlett, my petal. You have come to me, several times over the years, to tell me I am not treating you right, because of your gender. I always told you I had no choice and that I felt wrongfully accused. You were right, Scarlett. I have, indeed, underestimated you greatly. Your proposed solution is very feasible and shall be implemented at once. Riordan, please do prepare a speech to that tune, make sure they all will understand that not every mortal that shows up with a sob story will be approved to be turned, only a few we personally reviewed and selected hardship cases. Please also arrange a full vampire meeting for tonight so I can announce that, along with my decision to elevate my daughter, my firstborn, into the rank of vice-Grand Elder of the entire vampire populus. Hail Scarlett, my beautiful, sometimes aggravatingly stubborn but precious and smart girl.”

The word hail was repeated across the room, even though Blaine snickered.

“Damn. Not only do I have a queen as a granddaughter, Imma gonna be nailing the second in command of us vamps later. I should get my cock dipped in gold for all that.”

Caleb frowned, then raised his voice.

“Since we have once more reached the dreaded moment of Blaine’s latrine talk and his divulgence of unnecessary tidbits of information nobody should be privy to, I shall call this then. Meeting adjourned; please remain available for the announcement I plan for later today. And Scarlett, maybe you could find Connor and ascertain he will be in attendance for the announcement. Caelan and Connell, please round up the natural born vampires who haven’t turned again yet, seeing how it is probably going to happen to them sooner rather than later and have them attend as well, they are probably more vampire than mortal anyway. My daughter’s solution should appease those affected by it at least somewhat.”

Moments later Scarlett quietly appeared near the young man punching a tree in the ungroomed gardens surrounding Castello Vatore, took his hand and kissed it, made him face her.

“She’ll hate me for this, more than I will hate myself for being THAT again. She’ll leave me. She’ll take my son and leave me. She’ll run again, grandma.”

“No, she won’t. She tried that and learned the hard way that she loves you too much. I believe in love, Connor, and I believe in redamancy. The act of being loved and loving back in return. Unconditionally. She’ll stay. Have faith in her, Connor. True love needs faith.”

“What am I gonna do, grandma? I can’t check out of life now for a 2-week closed coffin nap in the creepy castle to grow fangs again I don’t even want, while my wife is having the roughest time with her pregnancy! Not to mention Jack or my work at the hospital. I am Chief of Staff now, I can’t be gone again after the long honeymoon we took. Goddamn the timing couldn’t be worse if we tried. Now I gotta figure out how to break this gently to Keira.”

“Learn to accept what can’t be changed. We tried, Connor, we really did. It didn’t work. Keira isn’t alone, she has all of us to pitch in, sit with her, help her while you can’t. Life never goes as we wish it would, so we can pity ourselves or reemerge stronger from adversity with a new approach. There are worse things in life than being what I am and what you will be again. Learn to embrace it. Use it. For your benefit and for good. We may only be mutations of humanity, but we are. So be, Connor.”

Connor nodded, wiped his eyes, then suddenly jerked awkwardly, a throaty gargle escaped him as he stared wide-eyed at his grandmother, before his eyes rolled back into his head and he dropped like a felled tree.

Scarlett caught him, guiding him gently to the ground.

“Oh, come on! Bullcrap. Not now! I thought he had more time. Yeah, he’s definitely gonna miss the big announcement now. SHIT!”

San Sequoia
The Coneira, home to Connor, Keira and their dog Morpheus

Keira answered the door, inhaled sharply when she found Jack outside of it.

“Howdy Ma’am. You look awfully pale. Have you been crying? Baby gettin’ to ya again? Uncle Jack’s here now, lemme have a word with that lil rascal.”

Keira shook her head and allowed the tall man inside, watching him drop his duffel bag without ever taking his eyes off her.

“Jack, I’m sorry, but I honestly forgot all about you. Connor isn’t here. He had to … umm … long story.”

“Oh. If this is not a good time … I can … we don’t …”

“No, no no. Stay. It’s fine. You got the appointments set and you need your therapy and all. It’s good.”

“Ya sure? I don’t want to be a bother. If you are afraid that people could think weird things … ya know … gossip. Saying you and I … we .. ya know, because we’re here alone without Connor. People do that. I can leave.”

“Argh Jack, I don’t care. Let them talk. I really have bigger fish to fry than bored neighborhood Karens dreaming up affairs for me.”

“Is Connor all right? Did you have a fight? You didn’t break up, did you?”

“No. Never. I am fine. We’re fine. He will be … fine. Eventually. Argh screw it, Jack, I don’t have the bandwidth to fabricate some BS to feed you right now. You’re friends, Connor and you, right? You’d find out anyway. Full disclosure here. Connor’s laying around somewhere in the undercroft at Vatore Castle in Forgotten Hollow, where the Grand Elder, the leader of the vamps, lives. My Con-Bear was born a vampire but got un-turned into a mortal last year, long before you and he met. Something went wrong with the drug or technique they used, and people are turning back into vamps left and right. Only those naturally born as vampires, so I won’t. I was born mortal but had Connor turn me at some point. Gawd, I remember that night, Con-Bear was so nervous, he was so cute, and it ended up being one of the most romantic … never mind. Anyway, I loved being a vamp, and my unturning was mandatory, our government ordered it, I don’t know how much you heard about that where you live, but it was a huge deal. Connor always hated being a Fang, and I always wanted to be one. Oh, the irony. I just found out he collapsed earlier today and is in the process of changing back already. He will be a vamp again, and I won’t. So, now I sit here alone, I can’t be with him, while he is in some dark coffin in some underground cellar all alone. So, that’s where we are at and I am a mental wreck. I should be with him, he needs me, I just know he’d feel me, but no mortals allowed in that area, blah blah. Well, I wouldn’t be a goddamn mortal if … never mind. That was way TMI! I am worried, sad, frustrated, I feel like the worst wife ever for not being with Connor when he needs me most. Argh!”

Jack just grabbed Keira and pulled her close, held her as the tears of despair started falling and didn’t let go for a very long time, just stood there holding her.

When she finally was out of tears, when the sobs subsided, Jack let go but made her look at him.

“I am here. For you and for him. Friendship isn’t a one-way-street with me. You guys helped me so much, Connor showed me much kindness when he really didn’t have to, you both are still helping me, so I am staying till he’s back home and looks well enough to roll. And I’ll help you whip that rambunctious little one you got there in shape till his daddy’s ready to take over again. We got this, Keira.”

Author's Note:
I had some issues with the formatting a few of the photos, so I just stuck them in as they were, tired of fighting a PMS-ing photo editor. If they're too small for you to see much, just open them separately and you can see all the details and even things I usually have to crop out for sizing, so it's not all bad.